Fear of Missing it

I had a feeling something was better, more enriching. That there were steps I could haven taken that would have placed me in an improved situation compared to the one I'm in now. Improved how? Well, I'd be happier in all these alternative realities of course. How so? I guess every different scenario just provided something extra in its own way, extra to my current situation. I found my mind often slipping into these other situations. In these situations I was doing things that would have garnered more respect, made me financially healthier and made my life less unpredictable.

These things were more aligned with what my education had proposed. Both formal and informal education. I was spending considerable time in these situations which took me away from the situation I was physically present in, but also made my physically present state less enjoyable because I knew that other scenarios were just superior. At least I thought I knew. But I was stuck. In an inferior place, unable to move to the superior places. Fear of missing it.

What if I could bring something to the situation regardless of the situation, that would nourish me. Something from within that I abs others around could feel. Make me feel alive. This ingredient would require me to actually accept and be in the situation im in. Because this ingredient can't sustain with an inconsistent host and I can't be in more than one place. It would also require a level of openness and letting go I've found so hard to reach in recent times.

But when I do it it really feels like the less I hold the more I have. If I could bring this element everywhere it would definitely reassure me that any situation couldn't out pass my current situation. Only love, love, love, love Only love, love, love, love

Jim O’Connell