#45: Domenique Fragale - Men Behaving Badly
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Have you ever gone through a difficult moment in your life? Depression, abuse, loss — these are awful and unfortunate things some of us have to deal with. In these cases, it’s not easy to know what to do to regain control of our emotions and reactions. Remember that you’re not alone on this journey. Know that things can and will get better.
In this episode, Seb speaks to Domenique Fragale, an actor and activist, who has been vocal about the sexual harassment received both online and in-person and the need for men to improve their behaviour. We talk about men’s attitudes towards women, the daily struggle of dealing with badly behaved men and what can be done to change social norms and behaviours so that tragic stories like Sarah Everard’s become less and less frequent.
Here are 3 reasons why you should listen to the full episode:
Empathise with being a woman in a male-dominated world that is hypersexualised.
Discover the tole it takes on women and the reasons behind men’s behaviour.
Understand how men can solve this issue by changing age-old attitudes and behaviour patterns.
5 Powerful Quotes from This Episode
“It was never physical bullying it was more mental manipulation and I would say a good 90% of girls have experienced that in some way!”
“I’m not having men dictate to me what I can do with my life.”
“We shouldn’t have to say “I’ve got a boyfriend” for someone to back off…we are not owned by a guy.”
“[by passing on nude photos] you’re hurting this girl and any potential for her future as well if it got out further.”
“I have to look ahead, I’m trying to protect myself. When walking home I’ll tie up my hair in a bun so I can’t be dragged and I walk with keys in between my fingers.”
Episode Highlights
Tole sexual harassment takes on women’s mental health
● Domenique explains how certain behaviours are ingrained in women to help protect them against potentially dangerous men. From meeting your friends in the day instead of night, tying your hair up in a bun so you can’t be dragged to walking home with keys meshed in between your fingers.
● Domenique tells us how the thought of lockdown being removed can be anxiety-inducing because all of a sudden women will be once again find themselves in potentially uncomfortable/dangerous situations.
The rationale behind men’s bad behaviour
● There is a certain level of one-upmanship in the macho culture where one comment or photo shared in a group can quickly escalate to vulgar comments or videos being shared. It’s all about who can say/do the most shocking thing.
● The lack of empathy on men’s behalf can allow them to act a certain way without feeling guilt or remorse.
How to tackle this issue, 1 person at a time
● Check your own bad habits like looking back at girls in public so that after a while you can develop good habits.
● Think and take a moment before you send/say something you might regret. Remember she is somebody and not an object.
● Call out bad behaviour, whether it’s from your friends or a stranger. By policing ourselves we can prove that women have people in their corner who are willing to help
Enjoy this Podcast?
We appreciate Josh coming on and sharing his story with us. It was touching to hear him speak so candidly about his experience and we hope this helps listeners on their journey, at whatever stage they are on. If you appreciate what we are trying to do with today’s episode and our overall project of The Earthly Delights Podcast, then hit subscribe and share it with your friends!
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To removing stigma,
Jim and Seb
